[...] This thing we're doing right now isn't working for me. And I've been trying to work through that on my own and move on and that hasn't been happening. So I just want a chance to [...] explain myself to you. And apologize. [...] And I hope figure out something that works for both of us, whatever that looks like.
What precisely do you mean by "this thing" On second thought, we really don't need to Don't you think you already made yourself clear when And what if "whatever that looks like" means that I
After Gavin died, I couldn’t imagine you needing anything from me. And I needed so much from you that I was afraid to ask for any of it, because I thought you’d say no and I thought it would hurt. [...] I know it’s stupid, but I convinced myself you wouldn’t care that much if I ended things, and that I was saving us both some grief by pulling the plug on a relationship that felt doomed to me anyway.
In retrospect I wish I’d taken a chance and stuck it out. [...] I wish we could’ve had more time together.
[...] I mean, you weren't [...] wrong. After it happened, I couldn't stand to do anything except focus on my work. I can barely stand it now. I'm not capable of[...]
Maybe I was hurt. Maybe I wanted [...] something else. But mostly I knew you were right to do it.
I know. We’re not very compatible. And we fight a lot. And we both have our own shit to deal with. There are like a hundred reasons why we don’t make sense.
But [...] if you ask me to come over again, I’m going to say yes.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
DM, 10/2
Disappointing. It makes me laugh when you complain.
DM, 10/2
I'm sure I can come up with something if you ask nicely.
DM, 10/2
Do youNot my strong point. Usually I just give you something else to complain about.
DM, 10/2
Yeah, but I'm trying not to start fights with you anymore.
DM, 10/2
You're still allowed to tell me when I'm being unkind. If you don't, who will?
DM, 10/2
Other people tell you. You just don't usually listen to them.
DM, 10/2
That's different. In those cases, I'm being unkind on purpose.
DM, 10/2
Glad you can tell the difference.
DM, 10/2
It's part of my charm. [...] You haven't really been holding back in order to spare my feelings, have you? Because of our little agreement?
DM, 10/2
I'm doing my best to be honest with you.
But you don't make itDM, 10/2
Is that so? Hmm. Acceptable answer.
DM, 10/2
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[...] No. You're right. I do want to talk to you. And this is the easiest medium, where I'm least likely to make a mess of it.
DM, 10/2
I wanted toOkay. [...]Right now, or[...] This thing we're doing right now isn't working for me. And I've been trying to work through that on my own and move on and that hasn't been happening. So I just want a chance to [...] explain myself to you. And apologize. [...] And I hope figure out something that works for both of us, whatever that looks like.
DM, 10/2
What precisely do you mean by "this thing"On second thought, we really don't need toDon't you think you already made yourself clear whenAnd what if "whatever that looks like" means that I[...]
[...]
You've apologised quite a bit already.
DM, 10/2
DM, 10/2
DM, 10/2
In retrospect I wish I’d taken a chance and stuck it out. [...] I wish we could’ve had more time together.
DM, 10/2
I'm not capable of[...]Maybe I was hurt. Maybe I wanted [...] something else. But mostly I knew you were right to do it.
DM, 10/2
But [...] if you ask me to come over again, I’m going to say yes.
DM, 10/2
You know, insanity is doing the same thing over and over again[...]
Then come over right now.
DM, 10/2